Desperation, Finding a Literary Agent and Perfect Matches

The other day a bunch of us aspiring authors were yaking it up in an AgentQuery.com chat room. Litgal, the studious, brilliant type had us read a blog post about writer firsts (first time getting an agent, first time getting a publisher, etc). It wasn’t the ‘first’ aspect of the article that got us talking, but the aspiring author desperation that can make us act in  ways that may not lead us to attain our career goals. (Yes, we aspiring authors can truly be a desperate lot. Note: not an attractive quality in dating, and also not an attractive quality in aspiring writers.)

While we aspiring authors are not desperate all the time, we do have those panic attack moments. That alone, isn’t the reason for concern. (Like dating, it’s when we act on our desperation that things go down a path that leads to nobody’s best interests.) For writers, desperation can lead us to sign with an agent who might not be The One.

To be honest, the idea of The One or a ‘perfect’ agent stresses me out. Why? Well, first of all, how do you know who that agent truly is when you send them a query letter? Yes, I research agents before querying and target ones that seems as though they might have The One potential. Yes, your research may gather a general sense of who the agent is as a professional, but the reality is, you won’t know who they truly are until you have talked to them and possibly even worked with them. So, who do you query? How do you know? What if there isn’t a The One out there for you?

Freaking out yet? Don’t worry, I have a theory. (Purely untested, of course, but I’m working on that.)

The questions is: Are there several The Ones when it comes to matching up with a literary agent?

My hypothesis: Yes. I believe so. This is a numbers game. A business deal. There are a certain number of agents out there that can help you make the most of your business (writing). The more queries you put out there, the more likely you are to reach the right agent. Some folks hit the right partner within 20 queries. Some need to send 200. (And yes, some never do.)

Because this is business and not some life-partner quest, I don’t think it’s fair to aspiring authors to think of finding a literary agent to represent them as The One. When finding the perfect mate, I was willing to wait as long as I needed. Decades, even. With finding a business partner, I am not willing to waiting that long. I am certain that there are at least a handful of agents out there that could connect with me and my work and vice versa (no desperation required to fog my vision). There could be a handful of The One agents that could help me bring my work to the world and help me reach my career goals.

I also think that the odds are in my favour–more than they would be if I were to go about finding a new, perfect mate. With dating, approximately 50% of the population is eligible for match ups. (I know, I know, there are men in that population who aren’t interested in women, who have already attached themselves to someone else, and men who aren’t going to be ‘t suitable. But you what I’m saying.) Of that 50% there is, say, one man in two thousand that you could see yourself marrying–happily–and being partners forever more. Not exactly the greatest odds. (Sorry to any singletons out there who now feel depressed.) With literary agents (around a 1000 in the U.S.A.), approximately 50% of the agents rep women’s fiction or romance (approximate guess, my favourite searchable agent database is down at the moment). Of that 50% (500), there are maybe five agents who would make a very good fit as a business partner and you could see yourself working happily ever after. Look at my odds: 1 in 100. That’s downright inspiring.

Next time you hear someone making an aspiring author hyperventilate by tossing around words like The One in the same sentence as literary agents, do me a favour, smack that person upside the head for me. Thanks.

Query Writing

Well, I have finally reached the point where I feel like it is time to start the one month process of banging out the ‘perfect’ query letter. Egads! Perfect? But there aren’t even hard and fast rules about query letters! How can you make a perfect one?

Well, folks, that would explain the large sized bump on my forehead from banging it on the coffee table for the past few days.

To prepare for the task at hand (writing the letter that could change my life and career–no pressure), I’ve read Noah Lukeman’s book “How to Write a Great Query”, which varies quite a bit from some of the excellent advice over on AQ Connect. <Bang goes Jean’s forehead again.> But rules are for breaking. Sometimes. Kind of. A little bit. When you are brave. And sometimes when you are stupid. Really, the line between bravery and stupidity can be blurry. <Bang, bang.>

Catch the agent’s attention and try and get them to read more. That is the goal of the query. That is my goal. I can do this. I can condense my 118,000 word story (which is still on a diet, by the way) into three dynamic sentences that show my voice, answer what the book is about, touch on genre, and excite someone I don’t know. No problem. <More banging.>

<Deep breath.> Not intimidated, no, not at all… Anyway, Query Shark wouldn’t chomp on my letter from last month, which probably means that it was not stellar and it was not awful. Just mediocre. So, armed with yet more thoughts, advice and lots of head banging, I am diving in. At the end of the month, I hope to have the query letter of all query letters and not have a concussion.