Where Are We?: Las Vegas

Have you ever walked into a place and thought, “Where the hell am I?” or “What the hell am I doing here?”

I had one of those moments last week. My husband and I went to Las Vegas for a few days. In the dead of the night (well, okay, dead anywhere else except Vegas which had traffic jams) we arrived at our hotel–after spending an incredible amount on cab fare. We walked into the shiny, glamorous entry of the hotel, our backpacks slung over our shoulders only to be met by a gaggle of Howie Mandel’s girls from ‘Let’s Make a Deal’. Okay, okay, not really. But they could have been stand-ins judging by the way they were done up. Or maybe they were call girls. Really, how can a country bumpkin like me tell? 

So, after weaving through the look at me giggles flicking their blown out fancy hair, we found ourselves in a sparkling, shiny casino. Huh? All I could think was, “Where the hell are we? And cigarette smoke?” The stale booze smell wasn’t nearly as shocking as the stunning cigarette smoke. It is incredible how quickly you get used to public spaces being free of cigarette smoke. (It is banned where I live, but not in Vegas casinos!) After my husband dazedly turned a circle, he discovered the check in desk behind us and off to the side. Whew.

The next stunner was customer service. They immediately began upgrading us and I of course, began panicking. But all for naught. Evidently upgrades are free. And thank goodness the room was said to be smoke free as I could already practically feel my lungs seizing up. So, off through the jangling casino we strolled, feeling self-conscious with our luggage slung over our shoulders. Finally, we arrive at the elevators. In case you are curious, no 13th floor. Up to our room which of course, smells like stale cigarette smoke. <Sigh.>

The next day, after a HUGE (and pricey–$3.50 for a beverage) breakfast we headed out to check out the strip. This in itself was an adventure as after walking for approximately forever, we discovered all sorts of things that were not in fact the strip (flamingos, a topless pool, people still drunk from the night before, a grocery store that advertised guns and booze, and some homeless people). And then at last, the strip. Wow, are Casinos really hard to get out of! We soon discovered that it usually took two of us to navigate through their wily keep-you-inside schemes. (In one Casino, we walked for over a km before finding our way out at the other end. Those things are mammoth!)

But we found the strip. Unfortunately, we wanted to cross the street. But it was blocked! Tricky, tricky. Eventually, we discovered that the escalators we had been avoiding were actually a way up to the fancy pedestrian bridges that we had previously not noticed. These pedestrian bridges were tricky too because they would often dump you into a casino. Sometimes, there would be stairs back down to the street–often set back so if you weren’t paying attention you would land in the casino. All the tricks to get you to spend all your money!

Here is a photo to show an amazing walkway which will spit you into a casino:

But soon, we were experts on making our way around the strip and put over 35km on our poor little legs in 3 1/2 days and found that the strangest things became entertaining rather than brain puzzles.

Camping Expedition

Went to Big Knife Provincial Park for a little get-your-feet-wet camping expedition with the little one. Sure was nice to go back to the familiar, quiet place. I’ve got a lot of fond camping memories from camping there with my hubby back ‘in the day’.

I had been a bit concerned that we might get there and find that there were no tent spots left–it being later in the day on a Friday (as well as being the best weather of the week). When we had tented here in the past, it was usually mid-week and I wasn’t sure what to expect on the weekend.

Anyway, we got to choose our own site and walked through them all, (lovely, lovely, quiet treed area) because we were the only ones there for the tenting area. Craziness! The place is like a secret camping nugget of wonderfulness. (There is even a wading pool, river, hiking/walking paths, a park as well as the usual basic camping amenities.)

As we were hauling stuff from our car to our tent site (quite separated from the RV section), some people walked by and I overheard one of the ladies saying that it was a shame that they didn’t take a bunch of the trees out of the under-used tenting area and make it an RV area as it was so nice and peaceful (and treed).

Some people don’t get it, do they? What does she think that the RV area used to look like?

Anyway, by morning there were four tent sites occupied. I say ‘by morning’ as one group came in the dark and although shining their headlights into the bush to see enough to set-up, they were very courteous. As was the other, basically, nonexistent group.

But then there was this guy who road up on his bicycle. I was like, ‘cool’. And of course felt totally unworthy because although tenting (and nobody in Alberta tents anymore) we had driven our car to the campground. (Of course. Like I’m going to haul all our camping gear and our daughter 140km.) But then I heard his cell phone ringing and later saw he was eating a huge bag of Cheesies. Now, I felt like he was in fact human and I might be still worthy after all. Whew!

And then his ‘girlfriend’ arrived. And talked all night. Yes, ALL night. Impressive, really. Occasionally she made forays past our site in the middle of the night on her way to the parking lot wearing her super loud slappy flipflops. Anyway, whatever. Why did she feel the need to run her vehicle at 3:30 a.m. for a few minutes? Dunno. (By then dude over in the RV section has ceased serenading the valley with his generator. So maybe she thought it was too quiet–I mean the coyotes were yet to start howling and the squirrels had stopped scolding us and had gone to bed. So it was pretty peaceful.) I think others arrived at their site too at some point after we went to bed.

Evidently, Flipflop Girl hadn’t seen a blue LED flashlight before as when I stumbled through the dark past her site at 5:30 a.m. en route to the outhouse with my daughter, she thought I was an alien.

Yes, an alien.

“Is that an alien?” she says in a stage whisper sounding entranced. “Hey alien do you have a lighter?” she calls out.
“No,” I say flatly, continuing to carry my daughter past her site.
“Really?”
“No.”
“How about a cigarette?”

By then I was back at my site, certain that my daughter would wake up in another hour ready for her day and while Alien Girlfriend Lady slept (she did sleep, right?), we’d happily make as much noise talking and laughing as possible without being totally transparent in our maliciousness.

But, we slept in.

I was saved from my malicious fantasies.

And I was really tired this morning. I forgot how hard the ground was to sleep on. No nice layer of memory foam to ease the weight off my hips. But whatever. We went camping! And had lots of fun! I forgot how good food is cooked over a fire. Like marshmallows! Mmmm.

Later…

Got home so hubby could help a friend build a fence. And now, I have a job. Well, one that pays. I’ll be opening up the library for my hubby’s old school–just until a new librarian is found. Kinda cool! I’m looking forward to it, but I’m already worried about how I’m going to balance things–like cooking and grocery shopping and all that second shift stuff. Suddenly I’ll have a lot less free time and freedom to get all these things done as I feel like it. But at the same time, I’m really looking forward to it and am already worrying that a new librarian will be found right away and I’ll have to hand over the reins just as I get comfy with them. Crazy isn’t it. I want it, but at the same time I don’t.

Oh, such conflicting feelings!

Seat Assignment

We’re on the plane and I’m watching ‘Spiderman 3′. How cool is that? Sometimes you can catch a flight that has the personal TV thing on the seat in front of you. Then everyone can watch whatever they want. Very cool. Sometimes, they really do use technology for the good of everyone. Plus, I won’t have to rent Spidey 3. Or ‘Next’. Saw that one on the way out. Cool twist on the action movie. It has Nicholas Cage and is very cool. I probably wouldn’t have rented it, but it was great. One of the better ones I’ve seen lately. And funny, because I usually don’t really care for movies I see on planes. It is like I can’t quite get into it or something. Or because the sound quality sucks so bad that I usually miss a lot and have to concentrate to get what I do.

Riddle me this: they can manage this technology feat of independent on-demand TV and music on Air Canada, yet they can’t seem to find themselves a program that books seats properly. How is that? It is strange if you think about it, isn’t it? I mean, you just need someone with some logic and programming skills, and voila!–less headaches for the flight attendants. (And the passengers.)

See, the reason I mention this, is this: we booked our flights online and there is a drop down menu for if you are traveling with a child. (Which of course, we checked off.)

Little note: children cannot sit in emergency seat rows.

And despite us giving them the info they needed, they assigned us seats in the emergency exit row. So, naturally, a lot of shuffling then occurred. Why ask if we are traveling with children if they aren’t going to make the necessary accommodations as a result?

And the strange thing is that this sort of thing seems to happen frequently. Once I was seated separately from my three-year-old and so they had to do some shuffling. Another time or two we were placed (and moved) in the emergency exit row. On this flight, the lady across from us paid EXTRA to ensure that she and her family were all seated together. Which they weren’t. They were refunded their money, but I mean, is it because they are trying to accommodate everyone on where they want to sit on the plane? Like what is happening to the info that they gather? Is it like the recycling program that they used to have in Yellowknife? (They collected the sorted recycling then took it to the dump because it was too expensive to transport out to a recycling facility.)

When I am not in the emergency row, I always seem to be at the back (like as in the last two or three rows) which is annoying. (Maybe sometimes they take in the child factor and try and stick us at the back because of it.) I don’t know why it bugs me being way at the back. Someone said it is the safest. Is it? Really if the plane crashes, is there a ‘safest’ spot?

Once I was so far back in the plane, I couldn’t even recline my seat because of the wall behind me. (It was the ‘Air Miles Seat’, I think. And the lady beside me was reading the same Grisham book as me, but she didn’t think that was as weird and cool as I did. Maybe she checked her sense of humour or they confiscated it at security.) And then there was the time last month that by the time they got to the back of the plane where we were seated, they had run out of food. That was just friggin’ great. And it was suppertime. And we were hungry.

And grandma got to sit in the emergency aisle. And so did grandpa. And we were at the back starving.

Later…

Still watching Spiderman 3…

Sometimes life is just hard. (Or at least if you are Peter Parker and have an alien amplifying your aggression.)

But like Aunt May (Spidey’s aunt) says, sometimes you have to start by forgiving yourself.

And We’re Back…

Well, we’re back home again. No vehicular mishaps or otherwise. Well, other than a lightning storm that prevented the ground crew from putting on bags on the plane on time. So, a one hour delay. But we had one of those planes with the cool TV sets in the back of the seat in front of you. So, we had TV and movies and music. It was great! I loved it. I got to watch some episodes of ‘How I Met Your Mother’ and ‘The Class’ that I hadn’t seen before. I really like those two shows.

Road Trip Plans

The first ever Hiebert-Oram road trip is scheduled for tomorrow. It should be an interesting and fun day. Originally, we planned to leave the house around 12:30ish to make it to my mom’s art show opening at 2. Now we are the meat and cheese delivery people. So it is important that we get there before the art show guests, so bump that time up a bit. Now we are leaving around lunchtime, so we have lunch to contend with, plus the traveling over 150km with three kids 5 and under. So, when the heck do you leave? We are thinking leave around 10 to make sure we get there by 2…

So let’s pack a lunch and load up the GPS with geocaches! We’re going on a road trip! Ah yes, and we have to stop for pie on the way home. Country Cousins’ pie is the BEST ever! I challenge anyone to top it.

You know, I wonder about road bullies. I really do. Driving on the QE2 in Alberta is an interesting adventure. I also find it varies on how you are treated depending on the vehicle you drive. The older, smaller, rattier nondescript car you drive, the worse you are treated. The bigger, nicer and newer vehicle you drive, the better you are treated. That highway is like a little snapshot of our society, eh?

Here’s to no road bullies tomorrow!