Cats As Editors

Never trust a cat when it comes to editing advice.

Seriously. They are no help at all. Okay, my old cat Edgar who is now frolicking through the proverbial mouse fields of days gone by (I know that isn’t proverbial, but it sounds nice) might have been helpful. He knew how to slice and dice. He would have been an awesome editor. When he purred, you felt like all that work finally paid off. I digress. My remaining cat, M, however is not editor material. Whatsoever.

You see, right now I have a scene that needs some paring down. Originally it was two scenes that were repetitious. Now it is one scene with a whopping amount of backstory tossed in and around the ‘issue’. I need to only have things in this scene (2nd scene in the book) that add to the whole of the book and propel the story forward. Problem is it feels like everything and nothing adds to the whole or propels the story. Make sense? Make cat doesn’t think it does either.

You see, she sits in my lap and purrs. The whole time. What kind of help is that? I need some tough love and she is gushing over EVERYthing. Her version of being tough on me involves laying on my arm so it’s hard to type. I need her to growl at the parts that can go. But no, occasionally she nuzzles her cute little head into my typing hand.

“Fantastic! I love what you’ve written!”

So see? Cats can’t be trusted as an editor. The only thing worse would having a dog as an editor. That kind of over-enthusiastic, adoring, unconditional love for everything I’ve ever written would not really help me grow as a writer.

“Love it, now let’s go for a walk, my ADHD is kicking in.” 

Oh, hang on! She just started washing her bum, that must mean I do need to cut those last 1000 words. Oh yep. Definitely. She just braced herself to really work it. Ah yes, and now that I’ve cut the scene, she’s cuddled in next to me again. Maybe she’ll make a good editor after all.

Authonomy

Some interesting things are happening over at HarperCollins. Specifically on their new website ‘Authonomy‘.

I was curious about this new online community site and signed up for them to let me know when it was ready. The other day I got an invite to try their beta version. I registered, uploaded my picture and snooped around a bit.

Authonomy, in case you haven’t heard much about it, is a site where writers can upload their work. They ask for a minimum of 10,000 words and prefer the WHOLE manuscript. You retain the rights to it as the author, but yes of course there is nothing stopping someone from snatching your work. Anyway, anyone can read what is posted (agents, publishers, editors, dude next door, other writers, thieves, etc). If you are registered, you can comment on the work and add it to your bookshelf. The works that are the most popular among the site’s readers will then get read by some people at HarperCollins. The janitor. Kidding. Sort of.

Anyway, I suppose it is a free way to get your work out there and possibly get discovered.

The thing is…

It feels wrong.

I don’t know why, but my gut reaction is, ‘No.’ And I tend to be a somewhat early adopter of new fangled tech stuff.

I guess it is the fact that they want me to put my WHOLE work up there for free. Which is fine, I guess. Except that I want to make money with this work. I want people to buy it. Now I do understand that as a business person, you sometimes have to give things away. So, sure, I will give some copies away when it is in print. I will. Even if I have to buy them from the publisher myself. But I won’t give away shares in my company. Know what I am saying? This feels like giving away shares. And for what? In hopes that some conglomerate sees me and buys me out?

I won’t even get into the whole it could get stolen, plagiarized and all that nasty line of thought stuff.

The other thing is that you are putting it up on the HarperCollins website. What if I find an agent for this piece and a publisher that is NOT HarperCollins wants to publish it? How are they going to feel about the fact that I previously GAVE IT AWAY on the COMPETETORS website? Personally, if I were them, I would be like, ‘uh, NO!’

Am I crazy? Am I skipping out on the biggest thing since that damned sliced bread?

As an aside, while I was looking for a pic of sliced bread, I came across this (which in my opinion is waaaaaay cooler than sliced bread could ever be):

Later Note: I emailed an agent about this and they were kind enough to take the time to email me back. The advice was, post a chapter or two, but not the whole manuscript as a traditional publisher may then consider the electronic rights to be compromised due to the posting of it in its entirety.

Naming Characters

What is in a name?

Good question.

Usually when I name characters, the name is just there for me and I plug along happily. Problem is, I am now getting to the point where I can’t recall all the names I’ve used. You have all these minor characters and old stories that one day could get resurrected and published and you don’t want accidentally reuse names over and over. You don’t want readers to think you only have 40 names in your back pocket and you keep reusing them over and over again because you have no creativity. Then there is the other problem of what if you use the name now and later find that it just HAS to be the name for the new character you’ve created and no other name will be as ‘perfect’ but the name is already used?

Anyway, I think I am going to have to start making a master list of character names so I don’t accidentally and unconsciously always have a ‘Ben’ or something in all my stories. Although that could be kind of funny…especially if he was a barista or something. Then eventually he could have his own story with all these other characters from the other books visiting him. It would be so Maeve Binchy.

But I doubt I’ll do that. Here is what I do when I get ‘stuck’ though. (Funny, I have never been stuck on a character name for longer than about 5 minutes and rarely have I gone back and changed a name.) What I do is go online. There are some great baby name websites and I just discovered that the American Social Security Site has the most popular names from different decades. Super cool if you need an older adult and you want the name to fit the time they were born in. What I’ve heard other writers do is save names from spam they receive. Isn’t that funny? Imagine the creative names they get there!

Put it Out There

Lately I’ve been putting it out there. I figure, if I keep putting it out there, eventually it will come back to me.

What exactly have I been ‘putting out there’ you may ask?

Well, I have been critiquing other people’s writing. I have been active in online writing communities. I have been asking agents questions on their new blogs and making comments on their posts. I have given Query Shark my query to slice and dice. (No slicing or dicing yet, but others I have told about QS have had their’s sliced and diced. Oh, pick me already!) I have been entering contests (like the RWA Grand Beginnings Contest and Nathan Bransford’s blog contest (pick me, pick me!). I have also answered another writer’s research questions for her upcoming article. I’ve bought and read the book of a writer who was kind enough to comment on one of my blog posts (funny book with the most unappealing sex scene ever. Also very humourous voice! Read it.). I’ve spread the word about Brenda Novak’s online auction (which includes critiques galore which are sadly waaaaaay out of my price range). I’m putting it out there. I’m trying to be a helpful, share the info kind of gal.

One day it shall come back. One day Karma will look at me and hand me an opportunity. And hopefully I won’t be asleep and I can seize that opportunity because I am pretty sure I am on the right path, I just haven’t reached the right town yet.

 Oh please, oh please pick me.

Friday Internet Fun

Well folks, it is Friday again. Since I am having a ‘people who use other people suck’ kind of a day…let’s have some fun on the Internet. The Internet is fun and will never use you to make themselves a better mom.

There is a great quiz here which figures out which Disney Character you are. Guess who I am? I’m Goofy! No, really, the character Goofy. Isn’t that great! Here’s why: “Your alter ego is Goofy! You are fun [true] and great to be around [very accurate], and you are always willing to help others [also true]. You aren’t worried about embarrassing yourself [SO true], so you are one who is more willing to try new things[Bingo. You've got me pegged].” A close second for me is Peter Pan. I suppose I am a goofy person who doesn’t want to grow up, dammit. Then again, with questions like, “You like to walk around with no pants on” are always excellent indicators of a reliable and true quiz.

I tried the ‘Which Patronus [like in Harry Potter] Are You’ Quiz but all the spelling mistakes started to get to me and being asked if I was brave (for the 6th) time wore me down and by question #118, I gave up and wandered off. Apparently impatient folks like me don’t have patronuses.

Uh, okay. Apparently I am a rap song. The options were pop song, country song or rap song. And I’m a rap song. Maybe I should have said I liked mud and my grill or MTV.

Huh. If I were an infectious disease, I would be Syphilis. Attractive. I guess the fact that my ‘passions run high’ and ‘I never forget anything’ signed me up for this one. And this quote, is just funny, so I guess I will revel in my ‘disease’: “Your recent comeback tour is going well, especially since you stopped listening to your critics.” Ha. Ha.

I took the Super Powers quiz with disappointing results. My super power is ‘can stretch really far’. Big freaky deal.

Well, so long and I think I’ll just sit here and grab myself a new drink from the other room…