The First Five Pages: Focus

I have been sitting on this chapter (from “The First Five Pages” by Noah Lukeman) for weeks now. The book sits there taunting me. Taunting, taunting, knock, knock, knocking on my office door.

 I am almost done the book, but I just can’t seem to make myself do the exercises on this one. I think I am burned out on keeping fixing and tweaking the layers of my ms.

Plus one of the exercises is to go through and ask what my goal was when I wrote each chapter. Goal? What? I was supposed to have a goal? Then I am supposed to break down the whole thing layer by layer and see if I reached my goal or if I strayed and whether it works if I did stray. Well, hell. Maybe if I was back in university writing one of my many sociology essays, but in fiction, I just don’t work that way. The whole book is a stray. It strayed out of my head and through my fingers, appearing on the screen of my computer. Goal. Sheesh.

 “Do all your sentences progress with focussed intention to comprise a paragraph?” I think I need a drink. And not tea and not a mocha. I need something stronger from the cupboard above the fridge. That or I need to put this chapter away and move on. Maybe when these sentences and ideas scare me less, I can come back to it.

I mean, it is great advice–if you are on your first draft and not your 80 bazillion-kazillionth and you just want the story to die, die, die! Go gently into that good night! Go! Flee! Skedaddle! Get sold so I can stop thinking about you already!

 

The Oprah Machine

From Publishers Lunch February 29th, 2008:

“Following Oprah’s enthusiastic endorsement Eckhart Tolle’s A NEW EARTH has added another 3.45 million copies in print, “the record for the most copies ever shipped by Penguin Group USA in a four-week period.” That’s on top of an initial shipment of 776,000 copies in advance of the Oprah announcement. BN buyer Jules Herbert says “for the first four weeks on sale [it] is our bestselling Oprah’s Book Club title.” The publisher says over 500,000 people have registered for the 10-week webinar that begins next Monday night.”

 

The Oprah machine never ceases to amaze me. She says something is great and all these people blindly follow her. She would make a great cult leader. Or maybe she already is. After all, she is charismatic, has people giving her money (Angel Network), taking her word as truth and more. Lately, I haven’t been able to watch her show because she has these amazing people on and then cuts them off and talks over them and puts words in their mouths or interrupts to talk about herself and her experiences when she initiated the subject—or a related one—which was supposed to be about her guest and what they do. Why does she even bother to have guests on her show? She could just ask herself questions. Plus the vast amounts of product placement and commercials and self promotion turns me off. There is no longer any content outside of Oprah and her products.

 

While I commend Oprah for encouraging North America to become more literate and is helping authors out by placing her little book club sticker on their books and instantly launching books onto bestseller lists, I also feel uncomfortable. Mostly because she has this great pulling power. Her current pick is about changing your life and leading with purpose, which is good. Many people are searching for purpose—myself included—yet there is something about this that doesn’t quite jive. Maybe it is her commercialism. Maybe it is the fact that she is a celebrity who can no longer bear the thought of sharing a bar of soap with another person. In other words, who is she to tell us how to live? She thinks we should all be spanx wearing, purposeful life driven consumers. If we are busy trying to emulate her and be all purposeful and enlightened yet trying to buy, buy, buy, what is going to happen? I think we are going to actually push ourselves further away from who we are truly supposed to be.

 

At the end of the Oprah day, we are going to be less the vision that she is trying to lure us towards, because in the end, Oprah just wants us to consume what she’s peddling.

Who Put the Extra Day in February?

Today, this moment, in a nutshell: 

  • Didn’t win anything more than ‘please pay again’ with roll up the rim. I want to win the freaking car, already! Or the money. Or the GPS. Or a donut.
  • Made media player glitch out.
  • Rolled my change.
  • Discovered that the ashtray in my car is exceedingly large and was harbouring a zillion coins. Yes! Let’s order pizza!
  • Finally got my hands on the BBC version of ‘Pride and Prejudice’. Let’s see if it lives up to the super-high expectations that have been gradually created over the years. (Not likely.)
  • Have one and a half days to find a baby shower gift as the one I bought a few months ago has likely been already outgrown by baby of honour.
  • I don’t want to cook. I vacuumed today. Isn’t that enough domesticity?
  • I now have to track down a car alternator.
  • I have three parts to return.
  • I have to go to circuit training alone tomorrow.
  • I am unmotivated.
  • My daughter doesn’t want to go anywhere this week. She didn’t even want to go to the park. There really must be something wrong with her.
  • My hubby bought three boxes of cookies a few days ago and I don’t know where they went. I mean, I know. But we are all in denial. Denial, I say. Denial.
  • The blogs that usually make me laugh are all about the boring business.
  • Somebody put an extra day in February this year. Now whose idea was THAT? Don’t they realise that February is a short month for a very good reason—that being that February SUCKS.
  • My daughter still only weighs 35lbs. I just want her in a car booster seat and I swear it doesn’t matter how much cream I give her, she only seems to feel heavier but won’t actually get heavier. It defies the laws of gravity and weight.

  • My daughter has only one volume for singing and it is earsplittingly loud.

  • I discovered that this software thinks it is March 1st. It isn’t. It is Feb 29th. And it is only 5pm. I wonder what timezone this thing is in and if I can change it–or if I even care…

 Later note: ordered pizza and had friends over, making it an all round wonderful day!  :)


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